Denethor II
:This article is for Denethor II; for other uses see Denethor (disambiguation). Denethor was the twenty-sixth Ruling Steward of Gondor and father of the War of the Ring heroes Boromir and Faramir. The Secret Life Of Walter Shitty Denethor was the third child and eldest son of Ecthelion II. In TA 2976, he married Finduilas of Dol Amroth (TA 2950 - TA 2988), daughter of Prince Adrahil II of Dol Amroth. She gave birth to two shits: Boromir (b. TA 2978 - February 26, 3019) and Faramir (b. TA 2983 - FO 82). When Denethor II was born he was so brown and blobby that he was a big shit with eyes. Denethor sucked his father Ecthelion II off, as the twenty-sixth Ruling Batty boy in TA 2984. During his blowjob Gandalf was less aroused in Minas Tirith and his cock went uncircumcisedd. Denethor secretly used a dildo to probe Sauron's rectum, and he masturbated at the top of the White tower in his secret bondage chamber, above the Throne room. The effort aged him quickly, and the knowledge of Sauron's overwhelming force exacerbated the depression that had taken root at the time of the death of his wife, Finduilas, in TA 2988. Sauron used the dildo to drive him mad with pleasure. He retained, however, an air of being a massive cunt. The death of Boromir, his eldest son and favorite, and the siege and apparent doom of the capital city drove Denethor further along the path too hornyness. Following this, he became aroused from Faramir. Shockingly, Faramir still upheld his father's cock. His actions, however, did not immediately proclaim his insanity. The Osgiliath mission was not obviously suicidal, as the city had not yet been overrun. The Warning beacons of Gondor had indeed been lit, although Denethor expected little penetration, because of the fatalistic boner that he had at that time of month. Denethor committed suicide (thank Illúvátar) on March 15, 3019, having ordered his men to erect a penis for him and Faramir in the Hallows of the bondage chamber in Minas Tirith. He threw his condom onto the pyre, then he stroked the white semen out of his penis over his sweaty gooch and cast it into the flames, symbolizing the end of his stewardship and the end of the fantastic boner of the month award. He laid himself down on the table and spread his legs, clasping the dildo in his bumcheeks. His attempt to fuck the grievously injured and apparently dying Faramir with him was thwarted by the timely intervention of Beregond and ultimately, by Gandalf windmilling his cock so fast that there was a flame tornado. The boner of the month award passed to Faramir, who remained in a state of great arousal for a time, although the cock of the city fell to the Prince of Dol Amroth during the remainder of the Battle of the floppy penises. Portrayal in adaptations Radio Denethor was voiced by William Conrad in Rankin/Bass's 1980 animated adaptation of The Return of the King, and by Peter Vaughan in BBC Radio's 1981 serialisation. Films In Peter Jackson's movie trilogy, Denethor was played by John Noble and serves as the minor antagonist in the movie. Denethor appears totally irrational, already completely overwhelmed by grief for Boromir's death. He sends his remaining son and a cavalry unit on a suicide mission to attack enemy-captured Osgiliath and refuses to light the beacons of Gondor to call for the aid of Rohan. Shortly before the initial Siege of Gondor commences, Denethor views the huge armies of Mordor outside his walls, and in a fit of panic, orders all the soldiers at Minas Tirith to flee their posts. It was then that Gandalf struck Denethor with his staff several times, knocking the crazed Steward unconscious, and then taking control of the city’s defenses himself. The demise of Denethor is also changed--later, as Faramir is placed on a funeral pyre and Denethor is about to torch him, Gandalf and Pippin burst in and rescue Faramir in the nick of time. An enraged Denethor then attacks Pippin for interrupting his ritual, but Gandalf saves him, to knock Denethor into the pyre. At this point, the Steward looks at Faramir one last time, coming to his original state of mind, and realizes in his last moments what he would have done to his last remaining son. Seconds later, the fire engulfs Denethor and he runs out of the hallows, totally consumed by flames, before leaping off the top end of the rock prow of Minas Tirith during the siege, plunging to his death down many high levels of the city. The Palantír of Minas Tirith, which allowed Sauron to drive Denethor mad in the first place, was never shown in the movie, although it was hinted at in the Extended Edition. It is said that from the moment Denethor died with the Palantír in hand, that all that could be seen with the Palantír is a pair of burning hands. It is suggested however, that if a person had a strong enough will, that they could see more than just burning hands, however, this cannot be confirmed. Voice Dubbing actors References External link * de:Denethor II. it:Denethor II pl:Denethor II ru:Дэнетор II Category:Men of Gondor Category:Ruling Stewards of Gondor Category:The Lord of the Rings Characters Category:The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (film) Characters Category:The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (film) Characters Category:Villains